Shaved

I just discovered the most wonderful thing. It is a real computer, but it's small enough to be moved around. And, it doesn't always need to be plugged in or connected to a cable modem. In fact, right now, this computer is actually positioned on my lap. Wow. This is going to revolutionize the way that I waste my time. Now, I can surf the net, play poker, screw up my fantasy football team and hell, even blog, from the comfort of my couch. I'm just glad I am among the first of the early adopters to splurge for this new technology.

In other news, here is the actual transcript from an actual conversation between Jenn and myself a couple of weeks ago:

ME: (poking my head out of the bathroom) Honey, I shaved off my goatee...

HER: (loud stomping of feet running down the hall) WHAT!?!?!??!

ME: How does it look?

HER: Um...shouldn't we have discussed this first?

I wonder what her reaction would have been if she wasn't a caring, compassionate minister?

So, this is me, courtesy of the built-in web cam on my shiny new laptop:










Sexy, isn't it? Jesus....what's with the roll below my chin?

(Honest to God, it's a good thing I am married. The average corpse is better looking than I am.)

When I went into the bathroom that night, I didn't intend to come out of it clean shaven. It's not like I thought to myself, "Self? How can I make myself even uglier? Oh, I know. I'll shave off the goatee."

Nope, it was a spur-of-the-moment type of thing. I've had my goatee since college because even back then, I had a round, chubby face and thought the facial hair would create a thinning look. The only thing it created was a round, chubby face with a goatee. That's OK. I liked it. And when I finally went bald the following year, I thought the shaved head, goatee'd look fit me pretty well.

Also, I had never seen myself with absolutely no facial hair - that is, bald and clean shaven - and I was curious as to what it looked like.

Oops. I haven't done anything that stupid since my best man convinced me to grow a beard, despite being bald. Thankfully, there are no pictures of that turbulent period.

The consensus is that the clean shaven look makes me appear younger. Probably. But most of all, I just look weird. When I went into work the next day, about 75% of the folks I interacted with didn't even make a comment, which tells me one of two things: either they were following their mom's advice in not saying anything if they didn't have anything nice to say; or (and more likely), my face is so utterly unremarkable, that anything short of a pierced forehead wouldn't be worth reacting to.

As for me, I promised that I would give my new look one month before I judge. Today marks the halfway point and although I will continue to shave for the next couple of weeks, let's just say that I am looking forward to having my dog come near me again.

25 Random Things...

On June 15 of last year, I blogged about wanting to blog more frequently. I then proceeded to add 3 more posts in the next 6 weeks and was never heard from again. Coincidence?

Anyway, now that we're all about change these days...and with football just about over, well, I'm back, baby!

Insert silence here...

The big fad making its way around Facebook these days is to come up with 25 random things about yourself. Not sure if these are supposed to be things that most people don't know about you, or if it's more a collection of, well, random and useless factoids. I am going with the useless route, which makes me eminently qualified to come up with a list of my own. Sure, I could do this on Facebook and "tag" 25 people, but nobody likes to be tagged (well, sometimes it's OK) and besides, I needed something to write about for this blog post. It was either 25 random things or a 7,000 word diatribe on how the country is on a steady path towards socialism, and given all of the Obama-worship, I am safer staying away from that topic....comrade.

And away we go...

1) I started losing my hair while in high school and decided to go bald at age 24.

2) Had I known how much better I would look without hair, I would have started shaving when I was 10.

3) My first dream job? School bus driver.

4) I absolutely hate to write....and yet I chose a career that calls for a fair amount of writing.

5) My fashion sense can best be described as "casual meets I-don't-care."

6) A sizable portion of my close friends were not met in high school or college, but during an 8 year career at Burger King.

7) Yes, Burger King. Yes, 8 years.

8) I've visited Las Vegas approximately 20 times, and it has snowed during 10% of my visits. I am pretty certain there are many locals who can't say they've seen 2 snowstorms in the desert.

9) I once defaced my own (former) car with an SOS pad.

10) My newest favorite channel on XM is CineMagic - it plays movie soundtracks.

11) I am alternately amused and annoyed at the naivete of those who believe that "change" means electing a President who has almost no real power, and then re-electing those in Congress who do have power...and who helped get us into this mess in the first place.

12) I own 13 hats and hardly ever wear them.

13) I used to be an excellent candlepin bowler when I was a kid. I can probably count on one hand the number of times I've bowled since I was 18...although lately I've been thinking of maybe getting back into the swing of things.

14) I once almost got arrested for public urination...and providing a fake ID to the cop who caught me.

15) Call me a geek, but I am looking forward to the new Star Trek movie.

16) I don't cry - not at sad movies, TV shows, deaths of people I know, etc. However, if/when anything ever happens to my dog, there won't be enough Kleenex...

17) When I was 10, I had some tummy issues and at one point, was banned from eating any dairy-related product for a month. It is a lot harder than it sounds.

18) I've never picked up a woman in a bar.

19) I can read extremely fast. When I was in my late teens, I would buy a book in the morning, read it, and return it later that day.

20) It is hard to imagine my life getting any better, yet I always find something to gripe about.

21) My suggestion for those into gluttony - the kitchen table at Buca di Beppo.

22) I HATE inconsiderate people, detest political correctness and am not all that enamored with Democrats.

23) I want to retire in Lake Tahoe.

24) One of my all-time biggest blunders - offering to pick up a good friend (and roommate at the time) whose car had just died....if he wouldn't mind waiting until after the Pats game.

25) Yes, I still read. And so should you.